A Surprising Trip to the ER (or "What to Have in Your Pockets to Defeat The Death Star") [UPDATE3]

Pretty, but what does this have to do with anything?

One of our cadre spent some time in the ER on Friday. The reasons we won't get into, but the experience is interesting. Not knowing he was going to the ER that day, our hero had in his pockets the usual: a wallet; keys; a Swiss Army knife; a lozenge of orgonite; a finger-sized citrine crystal point; a magnifying glass; and some breath mints.

So what? You have most of that in your pockets right now.

Well, this individual had had to visit the ER before on a few regretful occasions, and had always emerged rather demoralized -- and ostensibly sicker than before he went in, esp. after a two-day hospital incarceration and Western med injections. However, on this most recent visit, he had in his pockets the aforementioned organite and crystal that The CAT staff has been experimenting with in an effort to defeat the (negative) energy created by CERN's LHC, which deforms the earth's magnetosphere so much that 2/3rds of The CAT staff felt like noodleheads when the thing is turned up to 6.5 TeV. We've been trying all manner of objects in our pockets, but this orgo-crystal gambit really seems to work the best (producing zero LHC effect. It's in our pockets right now, and CERN's LHC is desperately ramping up to try and defeat the incoming Wave X (which failed miserably), as well as open a portal to "the dark universe." (Psst... this will fail miserably.)

So what?

Well, our victim hero also had said orgo-crystal combo in his pockets in the ER, and... while inside the ER, and undergoing a CAT scan, among other things... he felt fine. And when he left... he felt fine. This was not the case for previous visits. This pocket grouping seems to defeat negative energy environments -- or any environment where there is a ton of energy that can (overly) affect the sensitive.

We at The CAT recommend you secure for yourselves a small two-inch lozenge of orgonite and a citrine crystal point (or any decent crystal) and put them in your pockets, or wear them as pendants. They need to be against your body. Try it and see how you feel. It doesn't matter what's in the orgonite, so long as it's made the right way.

UPDATE 10-10-15: Through trial and error, it seems that MOLDAVITE works very well as one of the (high vibration) elements in the above orgo-crystal pocket mix. The CAT highly recommends it. We've also become big fans of shungite. But really, any crystal that raises your vibration is called for. Clearly, we at The CAT need bigger pockets.

We are hippie freaks, but... whatever works.

UPDATE 10-24-15: The above technique works... until you don't need it anymore. Eventually, if you're doing your meditation/vibrateUP work, your vibration will be faster and CERN's LHC won't affect you. It seems to have more of an effect on lower vibratory folks... which is not meant to discourage. All of the CAT staff were affected at first, but we're not as affected anymore, even without pocket protectors. Still, we keep the moldavite and organite in our pockets for spiritual redundancy. We're all about the spiritual five nines.

Ahead, Woo Factor 4: How to Make Crystal Water

If you do this right, it makes you feel all tingly. Note: if you teleport out,
be sure to have Scotty bookmark your previous location.

Yes, we know this sounds out there, but most stuff these days IS OUT THERE, so what the hell. Today we're going to give you a weird WOO recipe for Tuesday -- one we've all tried -- and... it works. Don't ask us how.

Yes, it's for "Crystal Water." Apparently, when you leave crystals in water overnight, in the moonlight, it somehow charges the water. Drinking said charged water is like having three cups of coffee, but without the jitters. It also starts the process of somatic crystallization... and I the writer am being guided here so I have no idea where somatic crystallization came from. Sounds good. Anyway, it's good and it's good for you. And you have to drink water anyway, so why not try this.

Place two quartz crystals (either clear quartz, or smoky quartz, citrine, amatrine, celestite, etc.), about the size of your little finger, in a quart-sized clear glass container, like a big mason jar or old milk bottle. Fill it to the top with clean, filtered water, and let it sit out in the moonlight overnight. No, you don't need to dance around it or utter weird incantations, unless you really feel like it -- in which case you should video it, naked of course, and post it on the 'Net.

Next morning, retrieve the water (might want to put clothes on first, nature girl), then get two pint glasses. Pour some of the Crystal Water into one pint glass -- then, over the sink -- pour the water from one glass to another, about two feet apart, four or five times. This aerates the water, and introduces a bit more energy into it. This is basically what A Man Called Da-da calls "Yogi Water," though in this case it's crystal-charged.

Aaaaand... Drink.

Here's some we made earlier. Note: if you make it right, you might be able
to walk on it... but don't get your hopes up, Carl.

Give it a try. Note that you can find the crystals on etsy or ebay for about $10. Try to buy them from the US, as the foreign ones are sometimes heat treated and not really what they're supposed to be. (If it looks too colorfully good to be true, it probably is.)

Now toast with us this fine first day of September. And, hey: stay off the FEAR BUS. The media will be pumping out fear like Shriners out of a B-52, so keep perspective. Better still, just turn it off.

                                                                                                                                               [#FearBus courtesy A Man Called Da-da]

Here's an out-there crystal water link, but a good one. Again, beware any bus Dick Cheney's driving.

UPDATE: it appears (at least to The CAT) that shungite works the best. Do some research and give it a try.